Three-Point Turn
Sep 24, 2023A Power-Tool for Mastering Alignment
Here is all the info you need to master the Three Point Turn.
If you have any questions, you can access free daily support in the Blissipline group.
Mastery is built on practice, repetition, and developing skill. You usually have to move through three stages:
Stage 1: Learning or thinking about it.
Stage 2: Practicing or doing it
Stage 3: Mastering and Being it
If you want to master Alignment, you need to learn to focus your attention deliberately and skillfully.
The good news is, you can practice easy techniques that will train you. The Three-Point Turn is both really easy and also fast end effective!
The Three-Point Turn
I have practiced the Three-Point Turn with many clients, and I notice it can take a little while to get the hang of it, so I encourage you to practice it a bunch of times.
If you do it several times a day, just for a few days, you will begin to really experience the benefit if it, and it will become a habit you barely even have to think about. Your focus will begin to naturally turn toward what you want without any effort.
This is important, because as Cheri Huber reminds us,
“Everything we want is ‘built’ through attention. Everything we DON’T want is also built through attention, which is why we want to keep attention on what we want.”
Three Great Resources
You truly can master Alignment. I promise. The thing is, it’s totally up to you to practice if you want to develop this skill, so I’m doing my best to set you up for success by providing you with everything you need to practice.
- First, read the basic instructions for the Three Point Turn. I have tried to keep it simple to get started. At first you can just follow the steps. As you have more experience with it, you will notice your understanding and appreciation of the process deepen.
- Secondly, I have also created a video explanation, in case that’s an easier introduction for you to take in. The two in combination will help you begin to deepen your understanding of the value of the practice.
- And finally, to really develop this skill, come join us on Facebook in one of my free support groups. In both groups, you are welcome to ask all the questions you want answered.
- In the Brain-Body Connection group, I help you understand and master the ways the mind and the nervous system interact so you can maximize your empowerment.
- In the Blissipline group, we approach the process in a more playful and spiritual way, deliberately connecting to our most joyful, aligned self.
You really can train yourself into alignment with all you want! So give the Three-Point Turn a try, and experience for yourself how it will benefit you!
The Basics
The Three-Point Turn is a way of redirecting your focus toward what you want. Whenever you notice you are focusing on something negative or on the obstacles that are in your way, this can turn that momentum around.
It’s very important to do this gradually, because otherwise it will trigger an internal reaction and generate resistance, so the Three-Point Turn is carefully designed to maximize your chance of actually improving your mood and increasing your alignment with what you want.
Important note: You will know if this is working by what you feel. If you feel ease or relief you are moving in the right direction. Your feelings are your best indicator of how this is going.
• Step 1 •
You can use the Three-Point Turn whenever you are experiencing thoughts or feelings that you don’t like or that are getting in your way.
Stop and notice what’s going on inside you. Take a breath or two, and feel into your body. Mentally note what kinds of feelings are present and what kinds of thoughts you’re having.
If you can describe them to yourself out loud in this way: “I notice that I’m feeling/thinking…”
Don’t go into too much detail. One or at most two sentences is enough. Just acknowledge the starting point of where you are right now. It’s not complaining or describing, but more like a simple taking inventory. “Aha! That’s how it is for me right now.”
Then complete step one by saying, “Ok, got it!” and take a breath.
Notice that although it took several sentences to describe step 1, it only takes a few seconds to do it. Step one is just a simple acknowledgement of what is already here.
• Step 2 •
Once you are aware of your current uncomfortable thoughts and feelings, you can invite yourself to notice what you would prefer to think, or feel.
You can use this kind of language: “What I would prefer to feel/think is…”
The is the step that turns you in the direction of what you want. Don’t try to jump too far. If you are miserable, don’t try for joy — just find the easiest next thought that brings a feeling of relief.
Again, give this a little time, and, feel your way forward. If you listen to yourself, you can always discover what you would prefer, even if it’s only that you would prefer not to think or feel that thing you’re thinking. That’s a pretty good starting point.
After you do this, stop and take a breath and notice how it feels. Remember: You will know if it’s working by how it feels. If you feel relief you are on the right track.
• Step 3 •
Now that you have turned in the direction of what you want, you can increase the momentum of your positive thoughts and feelings. Again, go slowly. If you go too far too fast, you will probably trigger resistance. You will know that has happened because it stops feeling good.
To increase the positive momentum, start with the phrase, “I like thinking about…” and let your mind add anything it likes about situation.
You can just say one simple thing, or you can let yourself riff on this if it feels good to you. Add whatever comes into your mind as a pleasant idea. This might lead into an extended imagination of things that would be pleasant or it might just be a short description of how nice it would be if this situation changed.
Another option is to use “Wouldn’t it be nice if…” statements. These can be great too, but in my experience they sometimes add a layer of resistance that feels like, “Well sure, that would be nice, but it’s not gonna happen.” So use whichever feels better.
As you do this, do you feel relief? If you feel even the teensiest little feeling of relief, you are moving in the direction of soothing and ease and the capacity to choose what you want. This step is usually 3 or 4 sentences, but it could lead into a whole extended thought process.
• Summary •
That’s it. Three steps.
- “I notice that I’m thinking/feeling…” (Ok, got it.)
- “What I would prefer to think/feel is…” (Check for any feeling of relief.)
- “I like thinking about…” or “Wouldn’t it be nice if… ”
If you want to really build this momentum, you can repeat steps one through three a few more times, and your feelings will improve even more, so that you start to feel hopeful or eager or even confidant. Once you are feeling pretty good, you can change from the Three-Point Turn to the Three-Point Affirm. The only difference is you change step two from “what I would prefer is… ” to “what I appreciate is…”
•Examples•
Here are two examples of how you might do the Three-Point Turn.
Step 1: I notice I’m feeling really cranky. Yes, I real feel cranky and overwhelmed right now. Ok, got it. (Check how that feels. If it feels accurate that’s good enough. And sometimes just naming the feeling creates a sense of relief.)
Step 2: What I would prefer is to feel happier. I would prefer to feel good. I would prefer to feel like I can handle these things, no problem. (Check if that feels like a bit of relief.)
Step 3: Wouldn’t it be nice if I could just feel better and actually have a good day here. It would be great to turn it around and start to feel like things are going my way. It would be really nice to have things working. For example, it would be so nice to have this project I’m working on work out really well. I would love to feel like this is easy. Yes, that would be nice. I would love for it to be easy. That would be so cool. (Check how this feels.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Step 1: I notice that I’m thinking that I don’t have enough money to take a vacation this year, and I notice I feel frustrated. Ok, got it. (Check how that feels.)
Step 2: I would prefer to believe I will find a way to go on vacation, and that the means are going to come to me somehow. I would prefer to believe that’s possible, even though I don’t know how it’s going to happen right now. (Check if that feels like a bit of relief.)
Step 3: I like thinking about maybe going to Greece. OMG I can see that blue water now. And I love the idea of sitting at some cafe, overlooking the beautiful sea, eating a Greek salad! Do they even eat Greek salad in Greece? I guess I’ll find out. I would love to go parasailing too, so I can look down into the water and… (You get the idea.)
The Three Point Turn Explained Further
Here’s a video I made to help you understand this better… It contains the instructions plus more explanation about why and how it works.
Please join us for extra support!
I hope you will let yourself enjoy this practice!
You can get extra support by joining us in the Blissipline group or the the Staying Calm in Crisis group, or both!
You are welcome to post your questions, thoughts, and even your practice sessions. If you post a question, be sure to tag me! You can also come to a live call, and get some direct support.
Joy and alignment are available to you!
Let’s rock this!
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